There are two kinds of people on Halloween: the Klums and the non-Klums.
The Klums — named after supermodel Heidi Klum, who famously turns the holiday into a personal art project — see Halloween as performance. She’s been a peacock, a giant worm, even E.T. Her passion for transformation has inspired celebrities like Beyoncé and Cardi B to treat costumes like competition.
The non-Klums, however, dread it all. For them, a worm suit is not creative — it’s humiliating. Between makeup, props, and pricey outfits, Halloween feels more like work than fun. (Americans are expected to spend $13.1 billion this year, including $4.3 billion on costumes.)
Still, if you’re invited to a costume party, it’s respectful to the host to participate at least a little — even if you can’t stand dressing up.
Finding the Effortless Middle Ground
Making an effort doesn’t require a full transformation. The key is storytelling. People will assume you’re in costume anyway, so decide who you are.
One woman showed up in her usual trench coat — and guests thought she was dressed as a detective. Another man wore everyday clothes and claimed he was J.D. Salinger, the camera-shy author. Someone else taped streamers to an umbrella to become a jellyfish.
Small details go a long way. Carry a big bag of sugar and call yourself a “sugar daddy.” (Risky, but clever.)
Clever, Minimal Halloween Ideas
• Wear a long black dress and change the props: cobwebs for Miss Havisham, fake blood for Lady Macbeth, a paper head for Judith.
• Dress normally and invent a character — a novelist, a secret agent, or even Martin Margiela, the invisible designer.
• Repurpose office clothes or accessories to make subtle statements.
The point isn’t perfection; it’s participation. On Halloween, your outfit will start conversations — even if it’s understated.
So if you can’t be a peacock or a ghost, be witty. That’s often the most memorable costume of all.
